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"GRACE AND GRIT is her story; and our story," Wilber writes (p. x). It is a real love story that unfolds against a Buddhist backdrop that tells us: "Life is a bubble, a dream, a reflection, a mirage" (p. 363). At age 36, Treya met the man of her dreams, in 1983. They married four months later. Ten days after the wedding, Treya discovered she had breast cancer, and then underwent surgery and radiation. Eight months later, she suffered a recurrence, followed by more surgery and eight months of soul-poisoning chemotherapy (p. 279) and baldness. Eight months later, Treya was diagnosed with diabetes, followed by years of recurrent tumors throughout her lungs and brain (pp. 240; 268).
Her cancer teaches Treya many things, including real suffering: "There is suffering in this world, no way around that one" (p. 280). However, through tonglen meditation, Treya finds compassion for it (p. 315). She learns "to be human. To be truly human. That is most important" (p. 170). Treya learns to "live in the present, not in the future, giving her allegiance to what is, not what might be" (p. 312). She discovers "passionate equanimity--to be fully passionate about all aspects of life, about one's relationship with spirit, to care to the depths of one's being but with no trace of clinging or holding" (pp. 335-6).
Of the five Wilber books I've read, this one comes closest to a memoir, offering its reader a revealing look at Ken Wilber, the man and "support person." "I'm a ... " he says (p. 361), as he silently performs his "daily chores" for Treya, including cleaning, laundry, cooking, dishes, groceries, and vegetable juicing (pp. 336, 362). He writes, "learning to make friends with cancer; learning to make friends with the possibility of an early and perhaps painful death, has taught me a great deal about making friends with myself, as I am, and a great deal about making friends with life, as it is" (p. 356). He also learns to "practice the wound of love:" "Real love hurts; real love makes you totally vulnerable and open; real love will take you far beyond yourself; and therefore real love will devastate you. I kept thinking, if love does not shatter you, you do not know love" (p. 396).
"Treya's story is everyperson's story," Wilber writes in his Introduction to the the Second Edition of his book. As such, it has much to offer any reader interested in personal growth, spirituality, relationships, illness, or caretaking, and it deserves a large audience. It also offers an easy introduction to Ken Wilber's vision. This is both a five-star book, and a five-pointed cosmic star book, "luminous and radiant."
G. Merritt
The philosophy is outstanding. Highly intelligent and compassionate. No-one I have ever read about worked at hard as getting her spirit well (in case that might cure her cancer) as Treya and yet she dies. A definitive repost indeed to all the Caroline Myss and Louise Hay's of the world. I have grown deeply angry with the "you can heal your life/ you create your own reality" approaches as I struggle with (I hope) grace and grit through my own, possibly terminal, illness. This book is a rare shining example of truth - bright, brilliant, loving truth - in amongst the heap of self-righteous publications out there.
Read it to be moved. To be enlightened. To grow in wisdom and courage.
To the readers delighting in pyschology and mystical philosophy, the book is a living breathing practice of such beauty--all presented as two loving people shared their devotion and many tears together.
Treya, thank you. I have found something that had lay dormant for years within me. Ken, I wish you so much happiness and peace, and thank you for sharing your story so publically.
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Catherine and Victoria are separated during infancy, growing up in vastly different worlds. Known as Catherine O' Banyon to her adoptive family, Catherine was never told that she was a foundling. Catherine grows up to become "Lady Cat," captaining a ship that smuggles of arms in defense of Ireland from the tyranny of William Pitt and King George. Meanwhile, her twin Victoria becomes a businesswoman capable of coping with most stolid board, as well as the fashions and snobbery of London' most elite circles.
When Miles Grayson captures `Lady Cat', he finds the perfect image of his missing fiancée, Victoria Carlisle. Everyone believes that Victoria is dead, and Miles is determined to deceive her murderer and bring him to justice. Therefore, he convinces Catherine to take Victoria's place. What he didn't count on was falling in love.
This sweeping historical romance encompasses adventure, heartbreak, mystery, two sensual love stories, and a fascinating psychic bond shared by the twins. Because so much groundwork must be laid for such a complex tale, readers may find the beginning a bit slow going. But when Catherine and Miles meet, the tempo quickly heats up, sweeping the reader away on a tide of passion and sensuality. The complex plot and deepening relationships between the characters rewards the reader with a satisfying romantic tale certain to keep the blood boiling. I heartily recommend DESTINY'S LADY to lovers of historical romance.
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I finally read Peyton Place several years ago, long after it wasn't 'hot stuff' or controversial. Certainly it isn't shocking by today's standards but the book presents an interesting view of 1950's America, far removed from the soda pop and sundae image that nostalgia has tried to recreate.
The story centers around Allison McKenzie, a girl coming of age and facing all of the challenges of growing up in a small town without a father. Her mother, Constance, is emotionally distance at the novel's beginning but warms steadily as she undertakes a romance of her own. Matt Swain is presented as the doctor with a conscience, and the impoverished Cross family provides an ample contrast to the genteel country setting. The book, in many ways, reminds me of Edith Wharton- characters whose lives are woven together in a tremendous fabric of narrative and insight. All characters seem to struggle with the perceived morality forced upon them by the social morays of life in a small town, and the manner in which the deal with problems provides much of the plot that propels this book. In short, this book is wonderful and probably on my top three or four lists of favorites. It's exciting without being tawdry, and something I wish I had read a long time ago.
Typically, the Kirkus review above pompously dismisses this as not being an "important" novel and decries its defender from academe as "puffery." Kirkus is well-known for such arrogant historionics and should be promptly ignored by the reading public.
The book gives me a sense of what a New England small town life is like. Of course, I don't, for a minute, believe that the events are typical. I enjoyed all of the characters Grace Metalious sculpted, and I also liked the plot very much. Grace Metalious constructed a perfect web of links between the characters to tell her story. At the center was the evolving relationship between Constance, her husband Tom (Mike) and her daughter, Allison. The other characters, such as Selena Cross, and the Harringtons added important sidelights. The sequel was quite well done and provided a welcome sense of closure, although it is not as riveting as the original.
Yea. I think you will enjoy this book, too.
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This is one of the best self-help books I've read in a long time. I like the fact the case studies relate to all women who have experienced certain relationships with men who were not right for them. Another thing I liked about this book is that the language is simple. Who has the time to hunt down the meaning of a word,while reading a page turner. I believe it would be a good idea that all women of color buy a copy of this book and read it. I was truly amazed at some of the ages of the women in these case studies.
I wish I would have had this book when I was 20 years old. I could have saved myself much grief. This book is a great read to keep on your shelf and to re-read. Props to Dr. Cornish.
vhodge
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It's funny that Williams quotes H. L. Mencken's remark that most books about writing are badly written. He first quotes it, then goes on to prove it.
Normal humans from Planet Earth wouldn't say "stylistic infelicity" when they meant "bad writing". They wouldn't say "peripherally relevant" when they meant "closely related". And they wouldn't dream of saying "topicalize X", not even under torture, if what they wanted to say was "make X the topic of the sentence". (You read that right, the guy unashamedly says "topicalize".)
Want some idea of what you'll be getting yourself into? Check out this boner of a sentence, typical of the writing style of the whole book:
"But the object of our attention is writing whose success we measure not primarily by the pleasure we derive from it, but by how well it does a job of work."
Someone ought to tell this guy to omit needless words. The parallelism isn't parallel, the phrase "of our attention" is pointless, the phrase "whose success we measure" is awkward, and that "job OF WORK" is simply nauseating. An Earthling would write something like this:
"Our goal is not just pleasant prose, but effective prose."
So the whole book is written in turgid-ese, even while trying to speak out against it. It's all just an endless wearying slog through the mire. Not unintelligible, just not worth the effort. For what do we learn at the end of the Long March? We learn we should omit needless words.
Last but not least, the book is a typographical disaster, with everything jumbled together and packed into the page. Skimming is impossible.
Many of the five star reviews here are from technical writers, engineers, and so forth. I see a guy from MIT, another from Compuserve, and that's as it should be. They're enured to bad English already, and I'm sure that compared to an engineering textbook this is John friggin' Keats. But for the rest of us, it's just not good enough.
(It's by a linguist, after all, and what the heck do they know about language?)
So it's back to Strunk and White for non-fiction. If you're interested in clearing up confusion in your fiction, check out "Writing and Selling Your Novel" by Jack Bickham, especially chapters 4 and 6. Teachers should consider "Classical Rhetoric for the Modern Student".
Joseph William's book Style taught me that language could actually be fun. I thank him for writing this book.
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The lack of female solidarity in _Summer_ is especially striking. Lily Bart had one devoted female friend. Charity has none, and the professional woman she turns to is far and away the most vicious character in the book.
Most of the book is about the blooming of a love crossing social boundaries that I find tedious. Others, including, I think Wharton herself, enjoyed chronicling Charity's first experience of love with an out-of-towner whose life and commitments are elsewhere, but for me it is the portrait of small-town busybodies and the eventual narrow corner into which Charity paints herself (with the help of social hypocrisy and her lack of education or any marketable skills ) that are interesting.
Susan Minot's introduction is helpful in placing the book within the course of Edith Wharton's life. A particularly important continuity across Wharton's work Minot observes is that "Wharton's heroines are not hapless victims; they understand their helplessness." I am not convinced that this enables them to keep their dignity, but the awareness of their plight and the unreasonability of social judgments heightens the tragedies (in contrast to Stephen Crane's _Maggie_ to take one example).
As always, Wharton vividly delineates the painfully constricted circumstances of her heroine's world. And make no mistake: the community that Charity lives in is almost unimaginably narrow and isolated, in a way that no community with access to the internet, TV, etc. could possibly be now, in 21st century America.
Part of what makes this novel so acutely moving is Wharton's depiction of how Charity's whole world opens up as love and passion enter her life. It's touching to see Charity's underlying sensitivity and sensuality - and her curiosity about the world - blossom as her relationship with Harney progresses, and at the same time heartbreaking to realize that, beneath her bravado, she is utterly dependent on him - because her gender, and her lack of money, education, etc., leave her with so few options.
The pleasures of this novel are many; I will limit myself to mentioning a few. Among the features of this novel which makes it so powerful and evocative are the beautifully rendered descriptions of the seasons and the natural environment. The lush portrayals of the plants, flowers, and the natural landscape highlight the erotic tensions inherent in the story.
I also admired the wonderful way each of the places in the novel - the village of North Dormer, the town of Nettleton, the mysterious "Mountain" - take on a distinctive character, and how all of them, taken together, become a microcosm of the world. This symbolism adds a resonance that gives this seemingly "small" novel grandeur and heft. Best of all, the symbolism seems like a totally natural and organic part of the story, not at all forced or strained.
The 4th of July episode is a dazzling setpiece that not only gives the reader some delightful social history about what such celebrations were like in early 20th century America, but also serves to underscore the themes of desire (those sexually charged fireworks, and all those enticing, yet unavailable items in the store windows!) and of Charity's journey from village to the world, from innocence to experience.
This novel also contains some of Wharton's most accomplished characterizations. The complex, morally ambiguous Lawyer Royall is, I think, a masterpiece. (Though I'll admit I was less satisfied with the portrayal of Harney - I think Wharton lets him off the hook).
Finally, this is a book about female sexual desire, and as such it probably broke new ground in the Anglo-American novel (Kate Chopin's The Awakening is the only earlier novel I know that handles this theme with comparable frankness). What Wharton is really great at is dramatizing the paradoxes of desire: the way desire feeds itself and leaves you forever wanting more, and also how desire - the sighing, dreaming, longing - can become an exquisitely painful/deliciously pleasurable end in itself.
Ultimately, like so many of Wharton's novels, Summer is about women's choices, and it presents a remarkably clear-eyed view of a strong-willed young woman's pragmatic yet painful reckoning, as she struggles to make the best of the raw deal society has foist upon her. Charity's fate has the semi-tragic inevitability of so many other Wharton heroines, yet here the writing is suffused with a tenderness that rarely, if ever, appears in Wharton's other works. Long after I put this book down, it continued to haunt me.
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I found the first section of the book, in which Grissom discusses attributes of Southerners and the South -- accents, food, and the like -- to be among the most entertaining. He tells the story of the War (including explaining why 'the War' means only one thing to true Southerners) and Reconstruction, paints moving portraits of Southern heroes, and recounts some Southern myths and folklore.
To someone familiar with other Southern-perspective histories of the War and its impact on the South, including Jefferson Davis' 'Rise and Fall of the Confederate Government,' Edward Pollard, or even the Kennedy brothers (not to mention unblinkered histories like Jeffery Rogers Hummel's 'Emancipating Slaves, Enslaving Free Men'), the central section of the book adds little that's new. Grissom helpfully includes a long bibliography, with recommendations for additional reading and study.
Perhaps the most interesting and evocative section of the book is Grissom's extensive collection of Southern photographs, most never before published, and nearly all dating from the War to the early years of the Twentieth Century.
This book should be required reading for all Southerners and those who desire to understand the Southern psyche. It is all right to display rebel pride and be proud of the Old South. The truth shall set Southerners free.
This book is continues to be so popular that it is still only available in hard back after being released in 1989.
Buy it, share it and donate it!
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In her latest book, EVERYDAY GRACE, that message speaks to an optimism founded in what she describes as a "mystical journey" ... [of] "personal transformation [whose] path runs through ... our own psyche." She believes that every human being must explore the "mystical realm" in each of us if we are to cope with our daily lives, fully appreciate our humanity and make some kind of peace with the chaos all around us.
The genesis of her proclamations lies deep within her personal convictions: "I have always had a sense that something is missing in this world". She proceeds to discuss the void, the emptiness she perceives we all feel as we strive to live our lives to the fullest: "I believe that hunger [is] for a lost dimension of experience, is natural in all of us and it doesn't go away just because we ignore it."
Williamson encourages her readers to seek the "magical source" within themselves --- the place at their core where she believes miracles are born. "We wish to cultivate the sacred in the midst of the great small difficulties [we suffer]. We want spiritual principles to be more than beautiful abstractions; we want them to actually transform our lives."
Sometimes the simple prose that forms EVERYDAY GRACE reads like a series of bromides --- sometimes it is very profound; sometimes the clichés jump off the page; sometimes the narrative is lyrical; sometimes readers will be convinced that just for the asking a miracle will take place; and sometimes, they will simply smile and say, "Oh yeah"?
Williamson fans and those who ascribe to New Age dialectic will find solace in her words of advice, while others will be more skeptical. But, in the long run, anyone who is seeking the "Truth" or the "Answers" will probably have as much of a chance of finding them in EVERYDAY GRACE as they will anywhere else.
--- Reviewed by Barbara Lipkien Gershenbaum
Those who have read Williamson's other books, and listened to her library of tapes, will be familiar with her message. Many of her ideas are based on A Course in Miracles, a kind of New Age bible that came about through channeling sessions in the '70s. Williamson is an invaluable agent to break its message down in easier and more relevant language.
The message is simple, as Williamson explains it. Only love is real. When we attempt to judge others, we are ignoring the innocence in them. By focusing on their guilt, we have forgotten that we are all children of the same God. We can give up judging by asking for a miraculous intervention, a simple prayer that our thoughts be aligned with God's. Ask to see the situation through a new set of eyes and a miracle will occur. Williamson believes this works not just on a personal level but on a political one as well. We must pray for our enemies and seek to understand them.
I'm sure that many will benefit from the advice Williamson offers. This book is a good one. I'd also recommend "Healing the Soul of America," an underrated tome from a few years ago.