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Dr. Sheila Dunnells
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Having "lived" through a similar experience, I can relate to much of the content, meaning and feelings described by David. Although my wife was fifty-six when she died of cancer, and I didn't have a two year old daughter to raise alone but four grown sons to be concerned about, I was easily able to relate to David's agony, his great feeling of loss and particularly his loneliness. He took me back to 1989 when I suffered my loss.
I was powerfully moved by David's story, his grief journey and his enduring love for not only Robin but for Louise, as well. His total commitment to give Robin as normal (whatever that is) a childhood and life as possible makes me feel good for Robin. She was so unlucky to lose her Mother at such a young age but so lucky to have such a caring and committed Father.
David's portrayal of Louise and the courage displayed by both Louise and David, which came shining through in this memoir, was most moving.
I thank David for freely sharing so much of himself and his family. It was a privilege to have had the opportunity to be allowed to share such an intimate experience.
What Collins has done so efficiently (along with his intense appreciation for aesthetics) was to encompass all the feelings that one might have while losing their spouse, and then vividly depict them throughout the story. At one point, he personified the disease, citing several times how he would have liked nothing better than to pummel the rapacious cancer from his wife's withering body. He was tired of failed treatments and hospitals; he just wanted to get this disease in a ring and duke it out.
Furthermore, Collins aptly described the frailty of life, which most of us tend to forget about until real disaster strikes. Amidst his drowning in a sea of hopelessness, he yearned for powers beyond his reach - anything that could save his young wife, he was ready to do. Yet the harsh reality of this world proved that there was nothing more that could be done. His defiance of the impending loss seemed as obstreperous as his wife's own battle with the unabated cancer, but Collins (appropriately) never delved too far into the details of Louise's personal struggles. He may have stripped his own emotions down to their purest and rawest form; but he managed to give the reader a heartfelt glimpse of Louise's suffering without being superfluous.
These were real emotions that any one of us could feel, and Collins held nothing back when expressing his disgust for Louise's cancer. And while he hints at an ambivalent God during his incessant bouts with frustration, he manages to exert hope that perhaps someone up above took his Louise for a good reason.
From his indelible love for his wife and countless battles with his precocious daughter, to a brief stab at imperialism and questioning of piety, Collins has written a daring work, one which I thoroughly enjoyed. I found that I shared with him many of the same opinions: relationships (and marriage) are not always utopian, but with mutual work, life with your loved one has the potential to be sublime. Moreover, when that fortuitous battle arrives (be it cancer or some other tribulation), it can be vehemently fought as a team, not unilaterally.
We don't ever want to give in or give up, but how do we carry on when that battle has been inexorably lost? As Collins stated, "...a miserable situation can be endured..." but that doesn't mean it's going to be easy. This story of grief seems like it could only be found within the pages of a book, but the fact of the matter is that it did happen; it happens to both good and bad people, and it's going to happen whether we like it or not. The true task is perseverance and subsequently finding the needed strength to carry on. For David Collins, he found his strength each day when he looked at his daughter. He had to carry on, if not for Louise, then quite simply for Robin.
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I have one of under 200 original copies, signed by the author, it is my treasure. I am so glad to see it here, offered to the general public. I obtained it just last month, and wanted to share it with every woman, man, child I know! I thought I was going to have to type the entire book just to give a copy to my mother. I thought that because of the small number printed that there wasn't any way I would find another one, but low and behold, here it is, reprinted only this year, on Amazon. A must for any Californian.
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Even Thirty-four years later, this mothers story is able to captivate one's heart.
Thankyou Louise Wilson, for helping me to better understand what it is that my own mother has gone through for all of these years, and for helping me through a traumatic time with my own handicapped son.
You are an angel from up above.
It hurt to read this book, but once I'd finished it the ideas swarming in me were many. I was reminded that, unlike Tony, I had the chance to make friends, find and accept love, and cope with trauma however minor. Later, I ammended this sentiment by deciding that Tony indeed has every chance I have. With the proper medicine and patience from those unfamiliar with his condition, Tony had and has every chance given anyone else to interact, make pacts, receive a phone call from a friend, and on and on.
What I at first found painful about the book: The similarity between the bookish and friendless state of Tony's schizophrenia and that of my depression (I refer to junior high and high school days as "The Monastic Years"). This heartache soon sublimated into a form of bleak hope. I realized years later, after my reassessment and new label of "bipolar", that both Tony and I are ill, and must adapt and grow as best we can within our respective cocoons. Thankfully, there is boundless help both in family and friends. I sincerely wish the best to Tony, wherever he is, and hope he has found the happiness once denied him by a simple chemical disruption.
Now all I have to say is, why is this out of print?
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It is a very short novel about the origens of a local legend. The shortness makes it an enjoyable quick read and the legend, although influenced by various fairy tales, is fresh and captivating. The story is presented in a simple storytelling frame structure. An old man encounters a young couple in a local romantic grotto and ends up telling them the sadly romantic legend associated with it of a young couple from years before and of the creature whose consuming love of the young man tried to destroy them. It is a story sweetly told, but with a close eye to the deep emotions of the characters.
I found the actual tale of the Sleep of Stone to be the best part of the book. The frame story was cute, but it was distracting. It actually took me a few tries in starting the book because I couldn't get past that part. While the end part is good, the beginning part (which sets up the real story) is not very captivating.
The real strength of the book was the way as a reader I was able to empathize with the characters' emotions. The young love of the couple was evident, but most vivid were the feelings of the creature that tried to destroy that love. The creature's obsessive love of the young man completely consumed her. This burning desire pushes her to trick, murder, and unleash utter chaos at the young couple's wedding. The passion is so real, it is disturbing.
The book follows a typical plotline for a fairytale type story, but it still is a touching and enjoyable read. Pick it up for a short cozy evening and have fun.
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I look forward to this poet's next collection!