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While you will not find my story contained within the pages of this book, I am there. I am a DES daughter, a cancer survivor. I am also a psychotherapist specializing in health psychology. Through my work, I hear a lot of stories, but few compare to those associated with the widespread medical mistake of DES.
Despite the scope of the problems created by this drug, those of us who live with the aftermath are in danger of being forgotten, or at least overlooked. Upon seeing a new physician recently, he said, "I was told in medical school that we wouldn't be seeing any more people exposed to DES." I informed him that I certainly hoped he wouldn't see any new cases of DES exposure, but there were plenty of us still walking around to tell the tale of DES and of our experiences with it. This book does precisely that - tell the tale.
Many thanks to Margaret Lee Braun and Nancy Stuart for a well-written and graphically poignant book. It is tasteful, respectful, and a much needed reminder that we are still here.
My response:
Reading this brought back to mind my experience reading your book. The first friend who gave it to me, a male, left it on my doorstep on November 6th last year, my 39th birthday, as a surprise little gift.
I remember being hugely excited as I unwrapped its package and I remember thinking that it was 21 years before on that same date when I found out I had cancer for the first time, on my 18th birthday.
(A nurse from the clinic at Balboa Hospital had come by and left her card with my roommate, reminding her that I must see the doctor again and why - she had left 2 previous messages the week before that I did not return, because it was my first day on the job at the Bank where I was then on that date, a full-fledged employee, instead of an intern. And I had not called back because I was busy preparing for that day and thought it was about more volunteer work, anyway.)
Anyway, what a gift. The first thing I usually do when I get home is run to the bathroom... I remember reading practically the entire book right there on the porcelain goddess.
(I had part of my bladder resected when the cancer spread the 1st go-round. It's fine now - all that delicious balloon stretching that I adored so much (yea, right!) had done a good job...I still drink a LOT of fluids.)
I know one woman who had cervical, vaginal and ovarian cancer and along with the clear cell adenocarcinoma they found choriocarcinoma when she had ovarian cancer. She had her cervix, uterus, ovaries, fallopian tubes, lymph nodes and spleen completely removed. She has had 1/3rd of her bladder removed and reconstructed, 19 inches of her intestine and part of her omentum removed and my vagina reconstructed two times. She had 7 surgeries, external and internal radiation therapy and 4 separate mutli-round sessions of chemotherapy - all encompassing eight years of her life (18yrs old-almost 21 and 30yrs-37).
Today, she still has two tumors in her lumbar vertebrae - one the diameter of a quarter and the other a dime.
BUT - she is healthier than most anyone she knows! (Can you guess who "She" is?)
I remember the tears rolling down my face and rejoicing at the same time, that now the world would know it's true, it's still true and it still will be true and true anew for many yet to come, unfortunately. But now, it was in writing and not just in medical journals or my own doctor's handwriting. There were documented "others" and I was not alone. I, and my DES sisters were validated. And, if any MD dared mention to me that it was a long time ago and nothing of consequence today, I would have something in hand to proudly show him or her before I quietly walked out of their office forever.
The feeling of AWE that sticks with me today continues to amaze me. I brought it to a family picnic around Thanksgiving time last year to give to my mother who was visiting from out of town, and my oldest brother picked it up and read the whole thing right there. My mother picked it up and began reading it very shortly thereafter and even asked me questions! My boyfriend read the entire book the night I gave it to him to read.
What continues to strike me is how this book appears to magnetize the reader, pulls them in and keeps them there all the way through. I've never come across that before or seen someone else experience that either.
Why is that? I believe it's because the book is so subtle. From the colors on the cover to the pictures on the pages, the message within speaks loudly, yet softly of a quiet strength, of endurance. The details are not of morbid skeleton bones found in a closet or of gross deformities or fantastic miracles. Depicting man, woman, child - they successfully link all humankind. Which, combined in this wonderful book, induce the quiet force, revealing the present triumphs of real-life people. "DES Stories" chronicles each individual's rising to the purpose, of finding the answers with mastery of oneself and of circumstance.
It is a peaceful, very special honor to have something in common with these very brave human beings. They are prevailers. We are prevailers! For we are NOT victims, which is what the word 'survivor' connotes to me. We have overcome and become stronger and yes, better.
Love, Suzette
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I am grateful that Margaret Humphreys found out about this and did all that she did, God Bless her. May her work still go on and be successful.
the emotional roller coaster that she was on and the strenth she and her family showed was amazing.
how she managed to stay sain during it all,and to help so many families and befreind them allis trually amazing.margaret is a fighter ,afighter for truth and for justice.
a truly remarkable book.
Margaret, undaunted by possible repercussions from the collusion of the governments involved, tells our story with heartbreaking compassion. Thanks to her tremendous efforts, some of us now will meet family we never knew we had.
For all who are concerned with humanity, with simple human dignity, this book should not be omitted from your reading list.
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The other thing that comes with using these tools is, that by implementing the connection process, one seems to be able to draw on deep, limitless power. I know of no other process that brings the same sense of innate strength that helps you persist and carry out the tasks that need to be done to transform your life. Thus batteries are included.
What will make the difference here, is whether you can make a time every day to work the six simple steps Margaret presents. It doesn't take a lot of time. It takes consistency and growing an awareness to know when it's time to use the simple tools. Once you get the basics down, it's something you can do driving in your car, waiting in line at the grocery store, or lying in bed at night before you go to sleep. For me it's become as natural as eating and breathing. Her latest book ties together all her earlier works and focuses on the spiritual dimensions of this connection process. One does not have to believe in God to do this work, or FOR IT TO WORK. I can guarantee that. I've seen many people use the tools without focusing on the spiritual aspects. I can also tell you that if you value or seek a realtionship with God/a Higher Power, this connection process will greatly enhance that relationship. Personally, as I have been able to work with and deepen the connection process, I have directly experienced God to a greater and greater extent in my everyday life.
Do I Have to Give Up Me to Be Loved by God is a beautiful work for those that want to heal the parts of their lives that hurt. For those that want to take that a step further and reap the spiritual rewards of this connection process, this book is a wonderful guide.
For those familiar with Dr. Paul's work, this book takes it deeper. I had wonderful Aha's, as the lightbulbs turned on deep in my being. This book describes the tools, that if practiced with consistency, can be the best gift you ever give yourself!
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The supporting characters include her neighbor Rich Longfellow, an aspiring scientist with a Holmes quality to him; his sister Diana, a Boston, pampered lady who is smarter than people think and Lem, a young boy who works for Charlotte and wants to go to Harvard one day. The whole cast is wonderful and they add color to the overall story.
The mystery: a man who just flashed some gold in a local tavern seems to burst into flames and disappear! This is spotted by a local who begins to weave a strange story. This whole novel had a old-time flavor to it and is one of the best modern mysteries that I have read. Oh, by the way, the history is accurate and really places the story in time and place. I highly recommend this to anyone.
Charlotte Willett, the main character, is intelligent and self confident, without undermining the realistic treatment of her place as a widow in colonial society. I was much impressed by this balance as achieved by the author.
The developing political pressures between the colonies and England are present, and offer hope for additional volumes set in increasingly turbulent times. All in all, well researched, convincingly written and with well paced plot turns. I am seeking out the additional volumes immediately.
I read Meg's book in one sitting. Actually, it was a train ride from Seattle to Portland. I was grateful for the confinement of the train, leaving me undisturbed to delve into Meg's world, save for a few pre-dusk glances out the window, taking in the natural beauty of our WA state coastline. turning to one another holds nothing new, as Meg would admit. However, when read in light of this past calendar year, her words hold all things new. Meg Wheatley has posited for her readers what I experience as a charge for all storytellers: How do you take what is common knowledge, retell it in light of what makes meaning in your life, and then let it go, out to the universe, praying it will be read with new eyes and heard with open ears.
turning to one another does just that, for me, its reader. And, without speaking in generalities, I feel this book will play its revelatory tune loud and clear to all who look inside its pages. Meg has asked us to put aside our technological armor, turn it off and sit. Sit with the silence, with the uncomfortable feelings of being silent. Sit with the many who are silent, too. Waiting. Perhaps then, in the silence of our hearts, we will rise to a place where we can speak. And if so moved, then we will do what Meg encourages us to do, "turning to one another, in simple conversations to restore hope to the future." Our future.
Meg Wheatley asks nothing more than a willing reader, compassionate eyes, empathic ears and the voice to speak new words. Words of hope, words of vision, of dreams for the future. Telling our stories. Not such a daunting task. Or is it?