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Mr. Fox had some of the deepest knowledge in regards to alcoholism and more importantly where we need to move forward to in achieving a better success rate in treating this problem.
I highly recommend this book to anyone who openly and objectively would like to know more about alcoholism and what other options are available to those who truly want to deal with their or a loved one's substance abuse problem and receive the appropriate treatment that they need.
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Ellis makes no bones about the fact that it is often difficult to achieve the changes you want to make - but that's no reason for not doing so!
Having tried other therapeutic methods, until I discovered Dr. Ellis at one of his legendary Friday night workshops, I can tell you that if you stick to the principles laid out in this book, you will be the better for it.
He emphasizes not only the aspect of feeling better, which many clients can more or less easily do (e.g. by exercising, meditating or distracting oneself from difficult feelings and situations). It is much more important to actually get better and permanently stay better. Ellis shows how you can achieve the kind of deep restructruring of your basic philosphies of life. He specifically recommends the use of the following techniques:
- Logical Disputing, e.g.: does it really follow that I am a worm if I am acting wormily?
- Realistic Disputing: Where is the evicence for my absolutist belief?
- Pragmatic Disputing: making cost-benefit ratios of short and long term benefits of my behavior and thinking patterns
To effectively dispute your irrational beliefs, you better dispute them cognitively, emotionally and behaviorally.
What I as a psychologist especially liked about this new book, are Ellis' exemplary disputations of low frustration tolerance, self-downing and other downing. This can help clients considerably to apply the ideas to their real life problems.
A good book to use for bibliotherapy!
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These strategies, by the way, work well with non-family neurotics, such as co-workers and supervisors. The book focuses on how to live with behavior in others that we do not have the power to change. Sometimes, we can find no better option.
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The incident is then complicated when Jenny starts receiving anonymous phone calls from a secret admirer, while at the same time, being harassed by someone else who wants her dead. Will she ever discover who either stranger is before the threats escalate to murder?
If you're a fan of Point thrillers, then you should definitely read this one. Recommended for ages 12 and up.
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A life changing weapon against the graveyard of missed opportunities, I highly recommend it!
This book is the excpetion. This book can help almost any person to be happy.
The basic idea of the book is this: People have certain beliefs about things. For example you might have the belief that you must be liked by everybody. Beliefs like this cause you to become very upset when you realized that this belief is being broken and twisted by the world in which you are living. For example, if you believe that the world should be fair, then anytime the world treats you unfairly, you will very depressed. Or if you believe that you must be liked by people, then anytime somebody insluts you, you might become depressed.
So point A= Our beliefs cause our distresses and emotional problems. Eg. if I want everybody to like me, I will feel depressed when someone doesn't
To stop these "irrational beliefs" you have to put in place of them "rational beliefs" such as "I want people to like but if they don't it's ok and I should rather accept myself as I am." When you have rational beliefs than you will not feel depressed at all.
The book talks about ways to refute your irrational beliefs and uses examples from case histories on how this can be done.
The point of the author is to make you understand these irrational beliefs and dispute them using various methods. Once you do that, then you'll be happy.
The authors, want you to be rational in your living.
I also recommend that you read; Feeling Good, books by John Sarno, and books by Aaron T. Beck and other Cognitive Therapists.
The book starts by briefly summarizing the results of Ellis' ground-breaking work on what we do that causes us to feel and behave differently than we want. The author then teaches his general cognitive system...which includes very specific instructions...on how to change these feelings, behaviors, and thoughts. Ellis terms this system the "A, B, C, D" method of "disputing" irrational thoughts that are "irrational" because they (i) are not true and (ii) produce results that we don't want. The book then moves beyond this general system and shows you how to easily use cognitive, emotive, and behavioral tools to effectively stop your unwanted patterns. While the methods are extremely user-friendly, they do require work...beyond the reading.
Because this book shows how to effectively tackle a wide variety of patterns...the following is a partial list of chapters:
1. Overcoming the influences of your past
2. Refusing to be desperately unhappy
3. Tackling dire needs for approval
4. Eradicating dire fears of failure
5. How to feel undepressed though frustrated
6. Conquering anxiety
7. Acquiring self-discipline
...and others.
While many other psychologists/authors, such as David Burns in his "Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy," use cognitive methods, Ellis shows how to use many of them far more effectively than most others. And he also includes emotive and behavioral tools, many of which he created years ago and that his non-for-profit institute has used successfully for decades. While Burns' book has some excellent additional tools, I strongly suggest that you start with "A Guide for Rational Living" and then move on to Burns' book if you want.
I've gone back to this and a few others of Ellis' books several times during the last 10 years or so. After working through a new situation, I keep realizing how much this one volume still does for me.
In my opinion, the book's only weakness is its stlye of writing. It's older style is less interesting than that in some of Ellis' newer books. I strongly recommend it not for its literary value, however, but for what it can do for you.
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To readers familiar with Ellis's R.E.T.(Rational Emotive Therapy)theory(also called REBT), this is already a familiar book, a variation on themes Ellis expounds upon elsewhere, most notably in "A Guide to Rational Living", written back in the 60's, where he lays out the basics of his theory. Readers unfamiliar with Ellis and R.E.T. might see his approach as similiar to television's "Dr Phil"(McGraw), and if you see the latter as something of a scold, you're likely to experience Ellis the same way.
Ellis's approach emphasizes "self-talk", and asking you to question your motives in avoiding anxiety-provoking tasks. He prefers behavior-oriented and pragmatic thinking over "what-happened-way-back-when" depth psychology. If such an approach strikes you as what you're looking for in a book about this topic, then I'd recommend Ellis. He's very straightforward and easy to comprehend.
to deal with procrasination. He instructs us in his A-B-C
system of mental health. We have the Activating event (A),
the Beliefs that we hold (B), and the Consequences of those
beliefs (C). (A) for me is writing this review. (B) is my Belief that it must be a perfect review. (C) is the Consequence
which I experience from that belief. Which is anxiety. When
we procrastinate, according to Ellis, we are holding irrational
(B)eliefs. The more we (D)ispute these beliefs, the more healthy
(E)ffects of mental health we will experience. Ellis also gives
us behavioral tools to help us eliminate our procrastination.
Such as a reward system. Nevertheless, his system depends
on disputing the irrational beliefs. There are two things that you might want to remember before you buy this wonderful book.
First, you have to use REBT (Rational-Emotive-Behavioral-Therapy) all the time. It has to become a powerful philosophy in and of itself. If you counter your procrastination ten minutes daily,
but then whip yourself with irrational thoughts and ideas the rest of the time, it won't work. For this, you might want to go to the REBT website (...) for more information. The second thing is that you might want to employ a Tibetan Buddhist technique to really dispute your irrational beliefs and to burn
in rational ones. To do this, you sit in a chair. Count to ten. And after you have counted to ten without losing your count, you THEN dispute your irrational beliefs. This is how
they burn in rational thoughts in the Gelugpa tradition of Tibetan Buddhism. Regardless, I hope that you enjoy this little
book. And I wish you all the happiness in the world.
If you're procrastinating, I suggest that you buy this book and start using it...now. As you're working with it, you might also augment your procrastination-fighting skills by using David Burns' "The Feeling Good Handbook." (I have found it more useful than its predecessor, "Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy," and you can easily use it without reading the latter.) And then, until you realize that you've made the progress you wanted, stop looking elsewhere for more books and more tools. That's just another procrastination pattern!
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Vince Fox writes in a way that is easy to read, yet provokes a great deal of thought. For anyone trying to make a change in their chemical health life and is struggling, for those trying to learn more about chemical health truth in general, and for those who wish to break the bonds and bondage of 12Step terror, I highly recommend this book. It can add much to your life if you wish to change and to know the Alternatives that are available to all of us.