Helen Singer Kaplan does an excellent job of separating out the psychological from the physical elements that contribute to having reduced sexual desire. Beginning with a distinction between genital dysfunctions and the arousal disorders, Dr. Kaplan proceeds through the importance of getting a complete and accurate picture of the patient's past and present experience that contribute to reduced or absent desire. After evaluation and a full understanding of the patient's goals for treatment, Dr. Kaplan moves into treatment strategies, using homework and other behavioral suggestions. She uses the exploration of underlying psychoanalytic causes only when the shorter-term solution-focused, behavioral treatments fail to make significant changes. The very readable case histories are a cross section of problems in this area and of Dr. Kaplan's innovative and individualized techniques for offering help. Her comfort with all areas of sexual behavior, anatomy, and individual preferences comes through in every sentence.

I was especially impressed by Dr. Kaplan's consideration of some people's lack of motivation in having insights into their personality patterns and behavior. She demonstrates admirable respect for people whose religious beliefs or ethnic norms prevent them from following some of her suggestions to fantasize, share fantasies, masturbate, or use erotica. In each case, she reframed the suggestion so that it was in keeping with the patient's values or she changed the assignment so that it was acceptable to the patient. Her understanding and respect that many couples have successful relationships that they want to maintain but that we, as therapists, might not want for ourselves, provided excellent role modeling for those who read her book. She also doesn't claim 100% success and is willing to discuss some of her treatment failures and why she thought she was ineffective-the mark of a true scientist.

~~Joan Mazza, author of Dream Back Your Life; Dreaming Your Real Self; Things That Tick Me Off; Who's Crazy, Anyway? and Exploring Your Sexual Self.

This is the book for you, if, like me, your endurance level is about 15 seconds from a soft-start. My partners have often been sympathetic but sexual dysfunction can put a strain on any relationship - it's all very well saying "It's all in the mind", but this does not help when you have coated your underpants by second base. Although I did not get off to a good start with the book... I found the author's compassion and knowledge extremely helpful.

When I read some of the positive reviews, I was skeptical, but this relatively short paperback was not really expensive, so I figured it was worth a shot. The bottom line is that it worked for me, and I am so grateful that I have the sexual confidence I have been missing my whole life. I didn't do the exercises with a partner. The author has exercises you can do by yourself, and they worked for me over about a month period. I find the author to really have a great handle on what "real" sex is really like, and what real sex should be like. In a world full of misconceptions and lies about sex, this book was so refreshing. I learned a ton about women, myself and sex in general. I would recommend really following the exercise steps closely and carefully, and keep at it. I am amazed. It only took 4-6 weeks of concentration and learning, and it really does work. I am amazed and relieved that I found this great book when I did. It could have been a lot more years, or a lifetime, of uncertainty and disappointment. If the author wasn't deceased, I would write her a letter to personally thank her for changing my life in an important way. I know this sounds over the top, but it's true.

I gave this book to a younger friend when I overheard his girlfriend talking about their checkered sex life recently. When she referred to him as the "Mennen speed stick," I knew just the thing to recommend for his PE problem. So I gave him this book, and it worked like a charm.

Opening the pages of this book will blow your mind away, if you are not familiar with the world of sex therapy. This wonderful manual is full of illustrative techniques used in counseling for different sexual problems. This book offers full page illustrations and explanations for the benefits of using these techniques to increase your sexual satisfaction with your partner. Kaplan has done a wonderful job explaining and demonstrating (through pictures) for couples struggling in this area. This can be a great tool for counselors wishing to show pictures of sexual techniques, and not just talk about them. One down side (but not enough to detract from the book) is the dated illustrations that you might find. It is a 12 year old book though, but stands the test of time in my mind. Beware, at opening this book for the first time, you might blush; but don't worry your face will just turn as red as the book cover. For those interested in Sex Therapy this is a must for your personal library.