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I cannot comment on the book's content, but I can note that my wife has not asked me to order a copy of either the cassette version or just the book.
The book is easy to follow and prepares you to read medical reports and to learn thousands of medical terms, including diagnostic, symptomatic, and surgical terms. The pronunciations help me pronounce words correctly when I talk to the medical staff at the hospital.
I recommend this book highly.
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I was also very interested in the data gathered through the youth support groups, offering insights into the adoptive experience through youngsters' point of view. The advice they offer adoptive parents is interesting and thought-provoking.
The real heart of the book is the personal stories of adoptive parents who have been long-term members of an adoptive support group. When I got to this section, I couldn't put the book down. I appreciated the openness and honesty of these folks, with their disturbing stories of the pathological behavior they experienced in their youngsters (the majority of whom got into major trouble in school and with the law and/or needed out of home placement at some point), the failure of professionals and social service systems to offer them real help, and their intense pain at the unraveling of their relationships with their well-loved youngsters and the chaos of their personal and family lives. The authors do a good job of identifying common themes among the stories and the experiences of other adoptive parents they have served.
Stylistically, there is some repetitiveness in the opening chapters, and the book was poorly proofread-- there are many typos. More subjectively, I was dismayed at one couple's "writing off" of their lesbian adoptive daughter as "lost" to them, simply because of her lifestyle. An editorial comment, such as those included with others' stories, might have pointed out that the gay or lesbian lifestyle is not universally recognized as unhealthy or dysfunctional, that many gay or lesbian people enjoy close relationships with their parents, and that this family may develop stronger ties in the future.
I would NOT recommend this book to prospective adoptive parents any more than I would advise couples expecting a baby to read a book about inmates of death row who were raised by their biological parents. These families' experiences are the extreme-- hardly the norm for adoptive parents and adoptees. This book, thus, lacks a larger perspective and could have benefitted from any of the following additions: stories/case studies of adoptive families served by the agency who did not experience crises of the magnitude conveyed in the book; stories/case studies of other adoptive families who constructively dealt with adoption issues at different developmental stages but whose children never acted out pathologically; a discussion of risk factors which may increase the changes of serious behavior problems in an adopted individual (such as a diagnosis of fetal alcohol syndome, or multiple pre-adoptive placements).
I WOULD recommend this book to adoption professionals and others working with adoptive families; it is quite an eye opener for those who believe a child who acts out is a product of a dysfunctional family. With some discretion, I would also recommend this book to some adoptive families-- the few who, like the parents in this book, are going through Hell with their kids and would benefit from knowing they are not alone; and others, like me, who are experiencing some bumps along the road but can say, after reading this book, that our kids and families are much healthier than we sometimes fear.
I am extremely grateful to the parents and youth who courageously shared their own stories and to the authors for making this book available.
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Fourteen years later, on the heels Stanwyck's resurgence (an Honorary Oscar, and an Emmy for "The Thornbirds"), Wayne reached into her trunk and turned her Taylor biography into a STANWYCK biography ---- but in doing so (her animus now more profound than ever) she omitted whatlittle of value the first book contained. Furthermore, when drawing on material from other books, Wayne's tactics are stunning in their audacity. Here are just two examples: Wayne takes Frank Capra's affectionate story about meeting, working with, and falling in love with the young Stanwyck (as told in his autobiography "The Name Above the Title") and systematically deletes everything except his first NEGATIVE impression. Then there's the story (from Ella Smith's excellent "Starring Miss Barbara Stanwyck") told by a witness to Barbara's first screen-test (which was sabotaged by a vindictive cameraman whose advances she had rejected). Here, Wayne has STANWYCK appear to be telling the story, which not only makes it sound self-serving but also allows Wayne to omit the gentleman's other admiring remarks. This is the kind of book for which the term "hatchet-job" was invented.
IN SHORT: THERE'S ABSOLUTELY NOTHING OF VALUE IN THIS BOOK.
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