Like the first reviewer I found this book on a bargain rack
in NYC. I am astounded that it is out of print. Shain's
comments resonated so strongly for me at that time it
was a breakthrough in my therapy. If you are literate
and sensitive you will respond to her little stories/proverbs.
The title is from Auden....."hearts that we broke long ago
have long been breaking others"....powerful and true

I found this book 10 years ago, on a bargin rack. What a find! It has helped shape the person I am today. The words are such an inspiration, I use quotes from it, and even have a tattoo of a symbol used at the front of each chapter. The tatto reminds me of the changes I have made, and of the message the book emulates. Everyone who reads this book, and lets it into their heart, will become a happier person!

It is nothing less than a crime that this book and that all of Merle Shains books are out of print. She possessed one of the most profound and insightful worldviews of any writer I've read. This book has literally been a beacon of hope and comfort during some of my most difficult times and the lessons learned have reverberated through the many intervening years since I first discovered her books. Amidst the flood of derivative self help books on the market Merle Shain's voice and incredible spirit are sorely missed.

Merle Shain wrote with an illuminated honesty that lit the dark places of all of our lives. Her simple truth and beauty helped me navigate through some rough waters and I would recommend her books to everyone who ever struggled with relationships in any part of their life. She lives on in all of us who loved her lucid and profound writing.

I read this book and it's authenticity, wisdom, and intimacy are beyond compare. No one I know of writes about love like Merle Shain. I read this book thinking she was still alive and when I found out she had already died I cried and I am starting to tear up even as I write this. She is writing with Love and you not only experience love through her words you feel it in your bones. After reading this you will be clear about what your role is in life when it comes to being in a relationship. A gem, a classic, and a gift straight from the heart. I treasure the few copies I have. It has made me wiser than my years. Thank you, Merle, from my heart, to the internet, and to the great beyond. Thank you. I send you my love.

All of Merle Shain's books are balanced, insightful, tender overviews of the human relationship in its various guises. Why these books haven't gone into re-print is beyond comprehension!

Oh what can I say about this book, except it has absolutely nothing to do with lovers being friends at all. I don't know how it got that title, had a few nice things in it about friends and some good advice here and there, but it just was not what I thought it would be at all.

A book that saved my sanity during the most diffcult break up of my young life at that time. The truth that this book pulled out of my introspection help me in all my future interactions with lovers & friends.

For years after I gave it to any woman I was seriously interested in. The book will help you examine the truth about yourself.

The contents of this book are as meaningful and helpful to me as they were when I first read them so many years ago. I can only wonder.... why, why, why... are all Merle Shain's books out-of-print and so terribly difficult to obtain?

A horrible little book. Don't waste your energy trying to obtain or read this trite book. I was expecting something insightful in this book. Instead a found a shallow book that could have been written in the 1800's. I can't believe this was recommended to me, it makes me concerned about the woman who recommended it!

I came across this book fifteen years ago, following the end of a love affair. I read and reread its contents, finding hope, clarification of past and present relationships, and an unbelievabe understanding of men. The book may not always convey what a woman WANTS to hear;however, with an open heart, she will experience its truths. Now, years later, I began trying to obtain a copy for each of my early twenties daughters, who I see experiencing the same former hurts, frustrations, and disillusionments as their mom. Many thanks for making this out-of-print book available to us.

This book should be reprinted and made easily available to anyone who has been in love, hopes to be in love and has been out of love. I gave away my paperback copy years ago. And now when I need it for a friend, I've had to find it via Inter-library loan. I'm grateful for that, but would like my very own copy once again. What was wise and insightful 20 years ago still applies today.