Randall Beth Platt, author of this brand spankin' new novel of silent era Hollywood, The Royalscope Fe-As-Ko, has captured the spirit of 1910s Hollywood and has displayed it like a glowbug in a mason jar for her to show off and for the reader to admire. While perusing this funny and entertainingly paced "Fe-As-Ko," one could easily begin casting all of these wily, early Hollywood characters for the movie version. Platt drops famous names of the era, like Mary Pickford, William S. Hart, Theda Bara, Mack Sennett, Thomas Ince, and D.W. Griffith, into her chuckwagon stew of fictional characters. I swear, if her fictional characters aren't composites of the real movie folks - they coulda been!

Cowpoke Royal C. Lectner has his hands full following his movie-struck wife and daughter all the way to Hollywood. While he has one eye on them, he has to keep his other eye on his two rambunctious sons, aged 8 and 10 - full of the devil and partners in pure mischief. Royal's wife, E.M., and their 16-year-old daughter, Elsie, have been bamboozled by one Marco Magellan into thinking that they will become the next Theda Bara and Mary Pickford (courtesy of Royal's bank account). As far as Royal is concerned, Magellan is a no-account, but what can he do? Royal, the confused cowboy, spends some time at Inceville and the lines blur between real life and the movies - real-life ranching becomes scenario material for the screen. With the help of Bill Hart himself, Royal will learn to love the movies he has no use for and have himself one helluva good time in the process. So will the reader.

This upbeat book will lead you right along the bridle path. Be prepared for tongue-in-cheek humor, wry cowboy philosophy and a heroic lump in your throat. That Platt woman has gone and done it. I'll be danged if she didn't pull off the whole danged shootin' match (shootin' a movie, Fe-As-Ko style, that is!). The Royalscope Fe-As-Ko is a highly recommended read for its funny foray into my favorite world - old Hollywood's silent gold rush.
- Copyright, 1997, Diane MacIntyre, "The Silents Majority"

First, Randi Platt is an old friend of mine, lost for years and then found again after her first Fe-As-Ko book hit the stands. We're such old friends that I know where "Leckner" and "Perrault" came from.

Second, I live in Walla Walla, Washington and if we didn't have a team like this in 1898, we sure did in 1973 when Kurt Russell (that's right - former Disney poster child, then the consummate cyber-soldier, Goldie's husband, etc.) played for the Walla Walla Padres. It was a third-rate farm club for the San Diego Padres, managed by a woman called Peppermint Patty - that alone tells you a lot about the team.

With that said, I loved the book. Problem is, I kept reading it aloud because its language is meant to be spoken. I have the same problem with Garrison Keilor's books.

It begs to be a movie and Russell should star in it. It would be a "Wild Wild West meets Major League".

Anyway, it's a very fun read and a story well-told. Thanks for it, Randi.

This time it's 1897, Royal and E.M have been married about four years. And so have Leviticus and Lou(ella) Perrault, owners of the Four Arrows ranch. Royal is still foreman of the ranch and caretaker of its owner. As he reminds us, Leviticus and Lou(ella) Perrault are "short a hat size", but "nice and honest, which is better than smart and fox-like any day."

It's time to take the cattle to Portland for the annual sale, and Royal is bringing Leviticus along to teach him how "to sign on the dotted line". E.M. foresees trouble in Portland and decides she'd better go along as well. So the cattle get loaded and all are headed for the city. Except, Leviticus who has managed to walk onto the train, down the aisle and right back off - something's caught his eye. It shouldn't be a surprise that a long-time rock thrower like Leviticus would get fascinated by a base-ball. Once they get Levi back on the train, Lou(ella) says they are going to get themselves a base-ball in Portland.

As it turns out (and things do turn in Royal's life), the buyer isn't available when they go to sell the cattle, so it's declared a day off. E.M's off to buy hats and Royal goes shopping with Levi and Lou(ella). Innocently enough, Royal accepts baseball tickets for an expedition game from one of the local storekeepers. This probably wasn't the best place to take Leviticus for "he may only have a half mind, but the half he does have is damn hard to unset." Worse, Royal runs into E.M.'s half sister and full-time trouble, Augusta, who is also the owner of this Bowery Bulldogs. E.M. shows up and immediately takes exception to find Royal in the club house drinking champagne with Augusta. Knowing this isn't going anywhere right, Royal decides to take his new fishing pole and get out of town, leaving E.M. to sell the cattle.

Days later, E.M. shows up with a wagon overloaded with men passing the bottle, whooping, hollering and following out. These are not men Royal recognizes. Like Jack sent to town to sell a cow, but coming back with magical beans, it seems that Leviticus traded the herd of 1200 cattle for his very own baseball team, just as Lou(ella) said they'd have. Smart and fox-like Augusta had him "sign on the dotted line" when E.M. wasn't looking. And now it is up to the Leckner's to look for the giant beanstalk, despite winter coming, no cash, and ten extra mouths to feed. But E.M. is not without her resources; she has her father sitting in jail, the "seven vestal Burnbaums", daughters of Idlehours late banker, and Lou(ella's savant talent with numbers.

To give the benefit of hindsight to this rather nefarious situation, Platt has Royal Leckner tell his story years after the events while narrating to one of FDR's WPA depression writers. Platt dresses Royal's storytelling with a narration so colorful it's hard not to want to read every line out loud. It's a talented writer that can write a spellbinding story that hangs together right down to the funny bone. And Platt does this yet again in her third fe-as-ko, as she keep the plot moving, the bases loaded, and the pages turning until it all adds up to another home run for us, the readers of these fe-as-kos.