A reviewer, July 27, 2002,
How Friends Affect Your Self-Image
The author's first book on friendship, "Friendshifts: The Power of Friendship and How It Shapes Our Lives" was an eye opener. Most of us just take our friends for granted. Her second book on friendship, "When Friendship Hurts: How to Deal With Friends Who Betray, Abandon, or Wound You," covers aspects of relationships that have really affected our lives from kindergarten on and that have impacted our self-images. What we think of ourselves, Dr. Jan Yager points out, has a lot to do with what our friends think of us. I learned a lot about the possible causes of negative friendships as well as why someone might put up with them. She shows her readers to seek out positive friendships instead of the destructive kind. Anyone who reads this book will never look at their friendships the same way again. Bravo. Enthusiastic Reader from New Jersey

Also recommended: Friendshifts:The Power of Friendship and How It Shapes Our Lives

When Friendship Hurts is a meaningful, practical and supportive guide for developing strategies on how to deal with and overcome destructive or negative friendships. Each well constructed chapter defines the challenges faced in friendships and provides direction and skills to implement change. The wisdom and guidance Dr. Jan Yager offers from her years of research on friendship motivates the reader to explore their past and present friendships. Through the encouragement of this self exploration, the reader can heal, begin to trust again, develop and maintain healthy relationships, and to become a better friend themselves. After reading this book I had more insight into my previous failed friendships and more importantly a deeper appreciation and respect for the wonderful friends that currently bless my life!

Christine A. Hartline, M.A., Founder and Director
Eating Disorder Referral and Information Center
www.edreferral.com

In her newest book, "When Friendship Hurts," Dr. Jan Yager talks to the reader about topics not often discussed in the friendship literature: the tulmultous nature of the relationships we sometimes have with our friends and the eventual breakup of friendships, even longterm ones. It was a book waiting to be written, and is a welcome companion volume to Dr. Yager's first book on friends, "Friendshifts."

Dr. Yager is a gifted writer who knows her craft well. In a caring and conversational tone, she combines research, storytelling, common sense, and insight to create a narrative that the reader can identify with at every turn of the page. This is a book that is difficult to put down, even for a moment.

Read Chapter 2 and discover the people you should avoid as friends. (Then read through that same chapter to see if you can find yourself. Just what kind of friend are you?) Other chapters will give positive and realistic advice on how to save a fading friendship, as well as letting go of one that has grown unhealthy. Dr. Yager's advice on establishing positive friendships is especially helpful and spiritually uplifting.

To those readers who read this book to help themselves get through a friendship crises: "When Friendship Hurts" will help you tremendously. To clinicians (social workers, psychologists, psychiatrists, counselors, psychiatric nurses, and others): this book will prove to be a powerful tool in your own practices, used as part of bibliotherapy with clients themselves, or as a sourcebook for other kinds of therapeutic interventions. And to those college professors who need a well researched, well written book on friendship loss and rebirth for your own courses in social work, counseling, sociology, education, and psychology, this is the book for you. "When Friendship Hurts" is one book your students will not return to the bookstore at the end of the semester. It is that powerful. This is a book your students will keep and take with them wherever they work in their professional careers.