The title of this book reveals the premise that Patrick Carnes presents. He tells us that the behaviors of sexual addicts are not actions of love, but of abnormal, compulsive rituals performed in a desparate attempt to self-treat the feelings of despair and anger that has become the fabric of the addict's life. This book is not an introductory volume, it is quite thorough and detailed. The author outlines six phases of sex addiction as well as explaining three levels of behavior. He points out that the different levels of behavior are not necessarily progressive, but the phases of addiction ARE. While this book is designed specifically for those who are care-givers for the sexually addicted, it also gives comfort and insight to the co-addict or codependent involved with the addict. The thoroughness and detail that he writes with may actually be beyond the easy comprehension of many addicts themselves, due to their cloudy comprehension and frequent separations from reality, but I would recommend this book as a challenge and as an invaluable tool for breaking the chains of sexual addiction.