We hear so much about the rewards of mothering, but so little about the costs. Because we love our children, women avoid discussing the heavy emotional and economic price we pay to become mothers. This book presents good solid evidence about the difficult reality of parenting in contemporary America, and it offers an intriguing solution...

Finally, a well researched book about the most fundamental roll in society, motherhood, and how our culture has short changed it. This book will open the eyes of both men and women to a problem too close for any of us to really see. For all the speeches about the importance of children and motherhood, this book gives every citizen the resource to see the issue clearer and follow through with governmental changes that will make a difference for our children and therefor our future. The empty rhetoric of "family values" is over. It is time to change our economic system to truly value the family. I recommend that everyone moved by this book buy an extra copy and send it to your local representative. I did.

I found this book very depressing and gripping at the same time -- not just from the vantage point of a woman who hopes to have children someday, but as an American citizen. The American work ethic, which has on the one hand been the engine for so much growth and prosperity, has done so without proper acknowledgment of its mothers. In many ways, it has done so at the expense of its mothers. As a professional woman in a high-paying demanding career, I did not expect to feel this way after reading this book, but here I am. As Ms. Crittenden points out, those of us who work long hours in the "public" world fail to appreciate the important work that must be done at home -- and at the same time resent the few policies and perks that make that job easier. Why should we support these "freeloaders"? Because in the long run, our society will come to regret that we didn't support -- and yes, subsidize -- the unpaid and largely invisible work of childrearing. (We pay generous subsidies to the brave men and women who serve our country in peacetime and in war -- don't mothers perform an important service as well?)

In my opinion, this book did a good job of identifying and explaining the most important issues relating to parenting and proposing solutions to those problems. The policies that Ms. Crittenden advocates are indeed hard to swallow, especially after our collective repudiation of the "welfare queen" -- how can we then embrace radical solutions like giving all new mothers a paid year off to raise their children? It's a good question -- but isn't it worth thinking about? In Scandinavia, mothers (and fathers) are given the option to take a year off with something like 80% pay to care for very young children. (If you never worked, your pay during that time is much less, so the incentive is there to first pay your dues.) As a professional woman, I do see the incompatibilities of a professional career and motherhood (not surprising, now that Americans work longer hours than anyone in the world). I've watched as many bright female friends leave their jobs -- with no likely prospect of returning to anything nearly as lucrative or intellectually challenging. It's really a huge loss to us all that all this human capital is allowed to leave the workforce. If more generous leave policies could enable these women to be mothers AND rejoin the workforce, isn't that a good thing? It behooves us to find a way to keep these highly talented people plugged in -- corporations and schools have invested too much in them to just let them disappear.

Not that we should consider motherhood a "black hole" into which women disappear and never return. To the contrary, Ms. Crittenden explains how countries' wealth and well-being depend greatly on good mothering. We read about the depressing results of poor parenting every night on the news, and the news doesn't seem to be getting better. After years and years of taking this work for granted, it will take a revolutionary change in our thinking to be open to policy changes that will support, encourage, and make possible good parenting. Maybe it's time to rethink our priorities, not just as women, but as citizens -- raising children is not just another chore like mowing the lawn. I am not sure how -- or if -- we will ever enact the revolutionary ideas presented in this book. But this book should be required reading for all of our legislators and CEOs -- these issues are just too important to ignore.