This is basically an autobiographical comic short story, with wacky illustrations to add to the fun. I bought it as a Mother's Day present for my mom right after I got engaged, and we read it aloud together in our favorite spot on the front porch, passing the book when one of us was overcome with laughter -- or tears. Ilene Beckerman can really write, and she does it with devastating humor and tear-jerking poignancy as she explores -- from the front row view of the mother of the bride -- the fun, the fights, the work, the tears, the trials, and often the complete insanity that all contribute to the creation of a beautiful wedding. At the same time, she critically (and beautifully) examines the complex relationship between a mother and her daughter. This short little gem will help you remember the things you appreciate most about your mother, your daughter...or both.

When my daughter became engaged, I got three copies of this book as gifts. I loved it so much that I have given away the two extra copies that I received to friends who will soon be MOBs!

The book is so real, so funny, so poignant. It succinctly summed up the relationship between mothers and daughters as it detailed the intricate and involved planning process for today's weddings. I loved the way Beckerman gave us glimpses of her daughter's growing-up years.

I felt every feeling the author was feeling --- I laughed, I cried, and I called my daughter to read portions to her.

And today....I found the perfect dress!!!

As the mother of a recently engaged daughter (my first, so this is very new to me!), I'm heading for the bookstores and the libraries to read up on how to plan a wedding. In the midst of books about what the maid of honor's duties are, lists of lists, pages of worksheets, and tomes about every single thing that a successful wedding...

There stands a small pink book that has a cover illustration which communicates as succinctly as the subtitle "The Dream, the Reality, the Search for a Perfect Dress." This book is 156 pages long, but can be read in an hour or so (including time to linger over illustrations and time to laugh some hearty laughs and shed a few tears).

Ilene Beckerman is not only the author of this book, but its illustrator as well. And that's part of the beauty of this book; the drawings are so perfectly entwined in the text.

It's a rare and very special author who can have you laughing one second and crying the next - especially when the author doesn't use a lot of words! Ilene succeeds beautifully in this wonderful combination.

From the book: "What do five girls - one short, one tall, one buxom, one flat, one who gave birth a month ago - have in common? A bridesmaid's dress they all hate."

Throughout the book, Ilene zigs and zags from telling about planning her daughter's wedding to writing about her daughter as a little girl and their very special relationship during her grown-up years. In a world where way too many people can't wait for their children to grow up and leave home, this type of writing is both poignant and refreshing.

Here's a letter that the author wrote to her daughter as the wedding grew nearer "I never knew before I had you that I could love anyone so much. You won't understand the feeling until you hold your own baby in your arms. I'm afraid you won't need me now that youo're married. I helped you get over your separation anxiety in nursery school. Now I need you to help me to get over mine." Then she says that she never sent that letter.

I really appreciated the review of this book that was written by a husband and father who called himself "A reader from NJ". He says that this book isn't just for women and I wholeheartedly agree. My husband laughs and cries simultaneously when watching his favorite movie "Father of the Bride." I think I'm going to go show him this book right now.

I thought that this was a compelling novel of love and loss and a womans change. she depicts her relationships in the upmost humor an sensibility. 5 stars from me!

I'm in love with Ms. Beckerman's concise
style of writing. Her grandmother's profound wisdom, remembered through each crisis in her life, can be a vehicle of insight for all women. I
sobbed for 15 minutes after finishing this book. Although I'm married, I'm still waiting for my "Stanley."

While I must admit the specific clothes in this book did not stir up memories, it did cause me to reminisce about some of my favorite clothes over the years. I loved the blunt, short prose - it was poetry for each outfit, giving us not only a sense of what she wore and when she wore it, but of how wearing each outfit shaped her into the woman she would become. Very clever, and well-illustrated. A book like no other.

Love, Loss and What I Wore is a very unique and moving little gem of a book. Basically it's the story of Ms. Beckermans life from young childhood to mature adulthood told through short yet extremely moving snippets of text and hand drawn pictures of the outfit she wore at critical junctures of her life.

The book works because it is open, honest sympathetic yet ordinary enough to relate to.

The drawings of outfits are one the whole simple and colorful and have an air of distracted affection about them. They relate and interact well with the text. But what sets them apart--and this is a critical element of why the book works so well--is they not only relate to the story but, in any reader, will evoke strong memories of time's and places out of our own lives. Rather than detracting from the book, this flood of memories in fact lend additional dramatic impact to the reading experience.

I have given this as a gift to several women I know and it has been a huge hit with every single one of them. I keep a couple of copies on hand for those time I need a gift and am too short of time and/or ideas to get anything else. This habit has stood me in good stead for quite a while now!

In the end, this stands as a classic case of synergy if ever I came across one. The story by itself would seem pathetically simplistic. The drawings by themselves are nothing to rave about. Taken together, something magical happens, and the result is a whole whose sum is far, far greater then the sum of its parts-a classic case of simple genius.

The book is charming and often touching. I don't believe numbers need to be assigned to these qualities.
Ilene Beckerman asks for the reader's clothing memories. Here's one:
Lili Fae, my granddaughter, celebrated her first birthday today. She wore the dress that I had hand-made for her mother, Anne, more than thirty years ago. The fabric is a flowered Liberty lawn I'd bought in London when I was pregnant with Anne's elder brother. (Back then we didn't know if our wombs harbored a boy or a girl.) The dress is gently faded and well worn. I photographed Lili in it, as I had photographed her mother in it. The photos aren't really necessary, the memories are so vivid.
-- Tobi Tobias